Well, I believe it's been over two years since I've posted regularly on this forum. I've read this forum on and off since then, and even made a few posts. But for the past two years I've been largely detached from this community. Now maybe I'll start posting again; maybe I won't (school and college applications are going to take up a lot of my time these next few months). But something tells me I'll be sticking around for a while.
I feel like I've changed a lot these past two years. Then again, being 14-17 years old will do that to you. I remember myself as an annoying, needy little kid back then who would make pointless comments to attract attention. I sure *hope* I've changed a lot since then...
So what's been happening to me all this time? Well, the biggest thing in my life that's been overarching these two years has been a long, complicated romantic debacle with this girl at my school. But for one, it's way too sappy for you to be interested in, and for anoyher, it would make this post ridiculously long. Anyway, it's over now (I hope; I have thought it was over several times in the past), so unless someone asks, I don't think I'll be saying any more of it.

I'm sorry to say that the change about me you might be most interested in is also the change some of you would find most disappointing. I understand that many of you are Christians. I remember my very first post on this forum was about how happy I was to find a place where I could talk about faith with others. But now I'm sorry to tell you I've lost my faith and consider myself an atheist.
The change was gradual. I'm not sure how I can go into the reasons for it without offending anyone. Suffice it to say I had some good friends around me who influenced me in that direction.
However, if someone wants to try to "convert" me back, I'd be more than happy to engage in a long, drawn-out debate over the matter. Actually, I'd be interested in hearing someone who really believes in their faith actively defend it against me. See, my parents and everyone in my church still think I'm a Christian; I couldn't stomach devastating them with the news that I'd fallen out of faith. I still go to church; I still sing songs of praise; I even play as an accompanist. My point is that they could never enter into a debate with me over this matter, because they think I'm already such a mature, incorruptible Christian.
But I'd still like to talk about it with someone, and talk about it without lying about what I believe in. I guess that's why I'm here.

kniv"Can someone help me out?"etsil