Internet movie scoop sites like Ain't It Cool News or even Corona's Coming Attractions depress me. These sites are staffed by movie lovers and they're patronized by thousands of movie fans. However, I think these people have lost the whole point of going to a movie.

Let's look at a film that internet geeks (henceforth referred to as "movie fans") would be interested in. _Star Wars: Episode 2_ is in post-production. Go ahead and search sites like AICN or Corona for Episode 2 news. You'll find purloined tidbits about the movie: plot outlines, production photos, leaked reports from the set, stolen images from the SFX department. News, news, news has been posted from people who want to be the First to scoop.

What will happen to these people when they go to see the movie? They'll already know the plot outline of the movie. They'll already have seen what most of the big effects-laden sequences look like. They'll already know the twist at the end. They'll already know pretty much everything the movie has in store for them. Of course they're going to be disappointed. "Is that all?" they'll ask as the credits roll.

It's like snooping through the closet and finding out what your Christmas presents are.

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I view the upcoming Harry Potter movie somewhat skeptically. Analyze the Potter series to date -- all four books are mysteries. _Harry Potter and the Sorceror's/Philospher's Stone_ has been the most widely-read mystery novel over the past four, five years now. Children have read this book. Adults have read this book. Now these same people are going to see a movie adaptation of the book -- and they all know who did it!

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If _Ghostbusters_ was made today, I'll bet you that Dana Barrett would have a small dog that would bite Peter Venkman in the crotch. Oh, I can't get enough of that joke.

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-Faux "There's a place in the industrial section I drive by everyday. It's called 'Exceledent Labs'. The name always makes me laugh. I can just imagine the owner instructing the sign people: 'Make certain the name is spelled with vigilant correctitude.'" Pas