Well, I warned you.

This fall, after being homeschooled my *whole* *entire* *life*, I am going to get swallowed up by that great blob known as the State University System. I'm not really scared, per say, but I am little anxious. 'Course, it's exciting, too. This is the first time that my parents are not going to be holding my hand. Don't get me wrong; I'm an atypical teenager who loves her parents a heckuvalot. (No offense meant to anyone about this; just seems like most teenagers I know can't wait to get away from their parents.) My mom's my best friend. But I am still rather excited to "get a life", so to speak.

So what am I anxious about? I knew you'd be just *dying* to know ^_^ For one thing, my sense of direction is best described as "Mmph." Getting lost and subsequently being late for class does not sound enjoyable. Neither does driving two hours round-trip every day. I *hate* driving. I'm also not very good at it, and for some reason I sometimes have trouble spotting stop signs and lights. Plus, we have nice thick clam chowder fog (Why do folks call it "pea soup"--green fog? Ew) from fall to early spring, so I'll get to drive through that nearly the entire school year. Whee.

Also, I can't decide what I want to major in, although I know this is a fairly common predicament. English sounded good, because creative writing really interests me even though I stink at it; but there's no writing emphasis available at Fresno State. Too, stupid me just realized how much I dislike my _high school_ English class: why would I like it at college-level? Now I'm thinking about Mass Communication and Journalism. At least the writing assignments wouldn't be boring literature theory that thousands of others have expounded upon, and I could still take the few creative writing classes offered. (I eventually want to get another degree, this one in Fashion Design, but that's too far off to worry about yet.)

Mom keeps asking me what I want to do with my life. I don't know. Working in the design department of Mattel Barbie is what I've been shooting for, but Mattel is in El Segundo and I'm a country girl. The city gives me figurative hives. (Plus, I'd be that much closer to Stephen--only so much one can take, y'know ;-) ) Then, there's my ham-ish-ness: I love to perform, whether it be acting, singing in the church choir, or doing silly skits for the Boy Scouts. But a career as an actress or singer doesn't seem very likely to pan out. My dream--currently ;-)--is to have a big spread somewhere in the Midwest where I can write and do my dolls and have a horsey, but that doesn't constitute a real job or steady income. (Of course, my parents moved out here to the boonies from LA and started an organic herb nursery...that didn't start out as much, either.)

On the exciting side, I GET TO TAKE REAL CLASSES!! That's good and bad, because my current teachers can be rewound if I miss something ;-) But anyway, I can actually ask the teachers questions! Woohoo! And there are so many neat classes. I want to take drawing and fencing (the kind with rapiers, not the kind with chain link) and fiction writing and advanced fiction writing and poetry writing and painting and drama and sculpture and figure drawing and voice and fashion merchandising and some business courses and yadda yadda yadda. Four years and 120 units aren't enough ;-)

I GET TO BE ON THE EQUESTRIAN TEAM!! Which is really weird, considering I have *no* riding experience. They're going to let me on as a beginning member--"walk-jog", whatever that means. But hey, I get to be around horses! The only bummer here is that I have to participate in "team workouts", offered from 6:00-7:45 AM on Tuesday, Thursday, and Friday, or from 5:00-6:45 PM Monday, Wednesday, and Thursday. That means I'd either need to rise at quarter to five every morning or miss my Venturing meetings (7:00PM on Monday). I don't really want to live on campus (see above about my feelings for the city), but on the other hand, my dad and I started this Venturing Crew a year ago and it's just now going somewhere. I don't want to abandon it. (I'd go into what Venturing is, but I don't want to bore you too awful much. If you want to know, just ask.)

I GET A CAR!! Okay, so this isn't as much of a thrill since I don't like driving, and it will be used, but it's still really neat. And, speaking of cars, I just got my driver's license! (Fair warning to Fresnans.) Now I have a piece of plastic with a dorky picture of me on it! They took the picture right as I was blinking, so I look as though I'm on barbiturates. Joy.

I GET TIME OFF!! Something being homeschooled has encroached upon is my free time. It's not unusual for me to be doing lessons at six or seven at night or on the weekends--and that's not including homework. Yes, the equestrian team will take up a lot of time, but I think it will be enjoyable. More enjoyable than physics, at any rate.

You know, I just realized something. RinkWorks makes a great psychiatrist and is a whole lot cheaper than a real one ;-)


La"No, I have never been to a psychiatrist, thank you very much :-P"Zorra