> > > Small Boy (maybe Calvin): Mommy, mommy, why am I running around in circles?
> > > Disgruntled Parent: Shut up or I'll nail your other foot to the floor!
> >
> > "Mummy, I don't want to go to Lanzarote for our Christmas holidays."
> > "Shut up and keep swimming."
>
> People find this one funny or revolting:
> Daddy, can I have a glass of milk?
> Shaddup.
> Please, Daddy, can I have a glass of milk?
> Shaddup!
> Aw please, Daddy. Can I please have a glass of milk?
> Shaddup and drink your beer!
>
> (I find it revolting because nobody ever taught the kid to say "May I.")

Multiple choice question:
How did you find South America?
A. I went to New York and turned right.
B. Revolting
C. I didn't know it was lost.
D. None of these answers is funny.