> I'm trying to start a collection of stupid warnings I see in commercials. One of the ones used often is "Professional driver on closed road." Some favorites of mine:
> Do not drive on the ocean (for a car commercial where the car comes up on the ocean and makes a big splash leaving the others, presumably, drowned)
> Do not use housepaint on face (enough said)
> Don't drive like this or you'll end up like Uncle Carl (the dead-and-cremated guy in an urn in the back seat of an SUV driving maniacally up a mountain)
>
> -Dr. Morris Cecil "Not intended for human consumption" Glalet, Th.D.
> Mon 13 Dec A.D. 1999

Sounds like a great new catagory of stupidity.
How about the one that started it all: "Kids, don't try this at home."
Maybe we need a class for disclaimers such as:
Batteries not included.
Action figures do not actually talk.
Parts sold seperately.
Caution; contains small parts that could become a choke hazard for children under three.
Adult supervision required.
Off road use only.
Unleaded fuel only.
I also love those child proof caps. I usually can't get them open, but my grand kids are always happy to open them for me.
Howard