#501

• What do prisoners use to call each other?
• Cell phones.

#502

• What do you call Santa's helpers?
• Subordinate Clauses.

#503

• What do you get from a pampered cow?
• Spoiled milk.

#504

• What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?
• Frostbite.

#505

• What do you get when you cross an elephant and a skin doctor?
• A pachydermatologist.

#506

• What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches?
• A nervous wreck.

#507

• Why are there so many Smiths in the phone book?
• They all have phones.

#508

• Why do bagpipers walk when they play?
• They're trying to get away from the noise.

#509

• Why do they call a horse a horse?
• Because they speak English.

#510

• Why did the bank robber go to the chiropractor?
• Because he had a crook in his neck.