> Can anyone suggest ways I might gain ten to fifteen pounds? > Ga"Why can't I get spam telling me how to gain weight instead of lose it?"halia

Aw, shucks. That's an easy one. Just follow any or all of these suggestions:

Give up all of your other bad habits and consentrate on recreational eating.

Take a cruise. There is no limit to the volume of fattening foods available and nobody is keeping track of how much you eat. Average gain is about 10 lbs. per week.

Go to Hawaii. Fat is stylish in Hawaii. Excellent food everywhere. Try the poi which is tasteless, but high in starch. I gained three lbs. there in just over a week. I had very few desserts. With a little effort, I could have blubbered out at over 200 pounds, gross. (Gross has a double meaning in that sentence.)

Visit my mother-in-law. Great country cook. I recommend the fried pies, cornbread, and country ham. World class bisquits, too.

When available, pig out on fast food with thick shakes.

Watch the stock car race on Sunday and eat snack foods when it gets exciting. Everything between the green flag and the checkered flag is exciting.
Green onion potato chips are my favorite.

Ice cream at bedtime.

Go camping at the beach. Camping, swimming, hiking, etc. will build your appetite. You can claim that you are doing these things to try to lose weight, but the result is more fat and muscle. Trust me. I've been doing that for decades.

Avoid fake foods like margarine, diet soda, low-fat sour cream, KoolWhip, sugarless anything, no-fat stuff. These will do nothing to balloon you up, and they may contain chemicals that aren't good for you. Some poisons are used for preservatives.

Grow a garden. Work makes you hungry, and the stuff you grow is better with butter or gravy.

Never throw away left over Halloween or Easter candy. No matter how hard and stale it gets, it's still fattening.

Pour Coke, Pepsi, or Root Beer over vanilla ice cream. Not just fattening. It's also habit forming and good with Oreo cookies.

Keep emergency rations in your car in case you get hungry when you're away from home. I like Goo-Goo clusters because you have to eat them right away. They might melt if you park the car in the sun. You can buy them by the dozen.

Never travel without peanut butter. You can stop anywhere and get bread and bananas to go with the PB or just eat it right out of the jar. Save the jar so you can carry trail mix made with M&M's, peanuts, raisens etc.

Keep crackers and cookies beside your bed so you don't have to go all the way to the kitchen in the middle of the night.

Move next door to a Mexican restaurante. Canned tomato juice (or V8) is good with Mexican food.

Fat is easy. How do you get thin?
Howard