Brunnen-G. Precisely the person I was thinking of when I mentioned people not sharing my particular beliefs. Partially because I consider you one of the most well-rounded and intelligent people I know, and partially because I know that, even though you don't agree with them, you will respect those beliefs because I do.


> Things can change so quickly in your life and make it so completely different. I'm glad you feel that the Rinkworks community is one with which you can share such things, especially when there are people like me who don't share your religious beliefs. It's nice to think the support you get in this place transcends all those differences.


See? I've said it before and I'll say it again. This place is special. Unique, even. I wouldn't trade my experience with it for anything.

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> You can't judge a person's character by the mistakes they make. Their reactions to those mistakes and their subsequent behaviour are far more significant. I think your honesty and courage in doing what you believe to be right in this situation speaks well for the future of your marriage and also for your future as an evangelist.


You're not the first person who told me that. And I think you're right that they are "more significant", but I must say that you cannot completely discount the mistake. There had to be something about the person's character which allowed them to get to that point. In my case, I know that I have a weakness in that area. It is something that I have had to deal strongly with. However, I've never acted upon the weakness until I could justify it in my own mind on the basis that I loved the girl deeply enough to commit my life to her.

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> I am only using the word "mistake" since it was something that seriously went against your beliefs. It was a mistake in that sense, but the act must be separated from the results. From what you say, you do not feel that your marriage is going to be a mistake, or your relationship with your future wife and your future child. Good. Years from now, I hope you will be able to look back and say that God blessed you when he gave you this wife and child. Please never believe that your marriage began from a mistake; your marriage is beginning from goodness and love and morality and honesty, and your desire to obey the will of God in overcoming your past errors. All the good things in your future family's life together will be a result of that, and a reward.


Thank you so much for those last few statements. I'm probably going to save this post so that I can read it again over the next few months. I don't believe now that my marriage is coming from a mistake, but if doubts arise I believe your words did an excellent job of illustrating that point. I wouldn't have asked her to marry me if it had just been to cover a mistake, but I'm sure that some people will think that and I might need the extra encouragement to offset that influence.

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> Brunnen-"was going to just say I agree with Sam, but Monkeyman beat me to it so I had to write a real post"G

Shan-glad you did-dar