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Burnout
Posted By: unipeg, on host 64.20.68.68
Date: Friday, October 20, 2000, at 22:13:47

I've been burning out somewhat recently. It seems that i'm the trusted person of choice of just about all my friends, so they come to me for advice. This is actually a pretty normal thing for me, so that's not a big deal. The problem is that i'm bruning out on it.

Recently it's involved huge amounts of diplomacy, because a lot of my friends are upset and my other friends when they come to me for advice. although I greatly want to be sympathetic, and often am, it's a very difficult line to cross - what can I agree with, knowing it's true, without slandering the other person? How much can I defend the other person without sounding uncaring? I guess I do a pretty good job, becasue people keep comg to me.

Let's see if we can list some of the weird friend anger things I've got here:
-one female friend who's constantly upset (usually rather unnecessarily) at one of my male friends.
-another female friend who is constantly (she has some good points, but tends to overreact a bit) upset at another male friend.
-a male friend who's had problems with a female friend because of weird crush situations - his problems are all well founded, though, and he's intelligent about it.
-a male friend who dislikes -and is disliked by - most of the people in our youth group. He frequently bashes my two best friends - both of whom I can see many of his points about, but whom I defend. I would tell him to bug off, but he's really struggling and yet growing amazingly in the group, and we can't lose him and I feel kinda responsible for keeping him around.
-a wide assortment of other people who come to me for advice or just to vent greivances - again, often, although not always, against other friends of mine.

none of those are REALLY all that important, i guess.... it's just that it's wearing me out, always listening to other's problems... then I have other's stuff all stored up inside me. I;m burning out... I've started snapping "answers" out without any diplomatic tact, which works so much better.... I would declare a "No advice from or venting to Lynette week"... but I'm afraid I would miss improtant developments, and I'm afraid I would miss my friends.

Any suggestions?

uni"i have one close friend who never vents to me, so i vent to him"peg

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