> I have a magic bed. I rarely ever make it up because every morning while I am in the shower, it makes itself. It also picks up any clothes left lying around and puts them in the hamper.

I have a similar magic self-making bed. It doesn't put my clothes in the hamper, but it does sometimes make half of itself while I'm still sleeping on the other half.

Still searching for the patent on that one.

> Take my thermos bottle for example. I can put lemonaide in there and it keeps it cold. But if I put coffee in there, it keeps it hot. How does it *know?*

That's an easy one. It analyzes a tiny sample of the liquid you put in, and based on its chemical composition (sugar level, mostly) it decides whether or not the liquid is supposed to be cold and refreshing. Newer ones detect artificial sweeteners too, so even your diabetes-neutral lemonade will probably stay cold.

> I don't understand that little light in the refrigerator either.
>
The light is operated by the food inside the refrigerator. As you know, all food houses vast numbers of tiny microorganisms (bacteria and fungi mostly) that make your food go bad if allowed to multiply unchecked. But in small quantities they know you can't see them, and they risk getting eaten and later killed by the acid in your stomach.

So when the fridge is open wide enough, some of these microorganisms get together and turn on the light, so they can see you coming and quickly move to a less visible piece of food near the back of the refrigerator that is less likely to be grabbed and eaten.

When you close the door, they turn the light off again so they can get some sleep. They sleep whenever they get the opportunity, since they are often woken up at midnight.

> And while on the subject, I have a magic computer monitor. Again, I suspect modern tecnology. I sit down, put my hand on the mouse and look at the screen. It light up as soon as I look at it. How does it *know* that I am looking at it?
>
This is just an optical illusion. The monitor doesn't know you're looking at it, but the mouse does. You get its attention when you grab it, and then it figures out your line of sight and alerts the monitor via high-pitched squeaks that can only be heard by a properly resonant monitor, but which translate roughly as "he's here, look busy!"

> And have you ever noticedthat when there is nobody in the left turn lane, the little green arrow doesn't light up? Probably modern technology again.
>
I see the little green arrow light up a lot when there's nobody in that lane. But for some reason, when I enter that lane and stop at the line, the light is always red. Maybe the ones in my town are broken.

^v^:)^v^
F"see? a crackpot theory for everything"B