> This forum seems to me like a place that expects a lot out of people. Of course, spam is and should be deleted. But if you just look at the content of some of the posts, they are, almost without exception, very eloquent and well-thought-out. For me, it was very hard to match that level of sophistication in my posts. But I tried. At first, all was going pretty well. But now I've noticed that of the last dozen or so of my posts, almost all have either been deleted, not responded to, or responded to only negatively. So I stopped trying. Which is why I haven't posted in the past month and a half, because I figured that I wasn't a good enough poster to post much of anything on this forum, seeing as the rest of you really didn't appreciate much of what I said. My self-esteem was taking a beating, and so I stopped posting, figuring it would be better for me, and you all really didn't need me here. In fact, I wouldn't have posted anything on here again if it hadn't been for Sam's post. So I guess, to sum it up, I've stopped posting because the forum seems uninviting because I feel that I'm not on the same level as the rest of you.

Me too. I haven't posted in a long time, and when I do post, it either gets deleted or (seemingly) ignored. I'm sure this isn't the case, but in the silence of the Internet, how can I really know? I love the discussions here and I very frequently have something great that I want to contribute. But I think about it... and I think about the lack of impact my past posts had, and I change my mind.

I certainly don't like to toot my own proverbial horn, but I think I'm a decently educated man with an opinion about almost everything. I live an unusual life that most of you would probably find fascinating, or at least cool. But nobody around here knows me. They don't know that I'm 18, a 2nd-year college student, a forensics competitor, a webmaster, a poet, a music fan, or a meticulously safe driver. I'm just some faceless entity, "uselessness," #4922863, if you will, for a random number no better describes me than that shallow and rather stupid word. Like most good web monikers, there's a meaning behind it. But nobody around here's ever commented about it, except for an "oh, that's an interesting name, he must have low self-esteem" way back when I first showed up on RinkWorks years ago. And of course, people are more prone to ignore me because I don't post often enough to be recognized, and as a result of being ignored I post even less. It's a vicious cycle.

It's generally accepted that cliques are bad. And there may be various arguments that RinkWorks isn't cliquey (see other posts about "elitism"). But whether anyone wants it to be or not -- and I doubt anyone wants this -- the RW community *is* a clique. I've got to raise the question however, is a clique necessarily a Bad Thing? They do involuntarily turn people like me away. But on the other hand, some of the best social bonding and conversation occurs within close groups of people. I am part of a clique in "real life." We don't mean for it to be a clique any more than RW does, but the fact remains that we are one. Regardless, I am glad to be a part of that real-life group because in it I have found many strong friendships that I'd never sacrifice for more superficial ones. In the same way, I feel that it's important for the RW clique to exist for the benefit of those in the circle. I am not one of these people, but your bonding and friendships are apparent even to outsiders. I'd hate to see you lose that.

So on that note, I'd say that Sam (and whoever else it might concern) should think twice before trying to abolish the elitism. Everyone has a place in a group of friends somewhere. I'd be honored to be one of the RinkWorks elite, but it's simply not my place. That's what real life is for, at least in my situation. But you -- the true members of this community -- do belong here, and you shouldn't give up your closeness to make me feel more welcome. The way I see it, the RinkWorks community can go two ways: Either have a small number of close friends, or a large number of more distant acquaintances. I vote for the first, even if it doesn't include me.

The nice thing about online stuff like this is that outsiders can still listen in and occasionally participate. And we can join the clique too, don't get me wrong; I haven't really tried as hard as I could have. But for years I've read the Forum and felt like I've connected with you guys. I don't really know any of you, but at the same time I've shared in your triumphs, wept for your trials, and have been utterly stimulated by some of the deeper philosophical discussions. I love this stuff! Even if it's rather one-sided for me, it makes for great reading.

As far as RinkChat is concerned, I haven't used it in ages. So I can't really comment on the current state of things over in that neck of the woods. Actually, I headed over there tonight for the first time in at least two years. Not surprisingly, my username "uselessness" wasn't registered any more. So I re-registered it and logged in. But once in the lobby, I noticed that I didn't really know anybody who was chatting, so I logged out and went away. I don't expect I'll ever be anything other than an outsider around here. But like I said earlier, I'm down with that. I have good friends in real life. I just like coming to RinkWorks because it's great to read.

So that's the point of this post. I think exclusion, to some degree, is necessary, and it doesn't really bother me. I've enjoyed coming here for many years and reading the posts. Even though I rarely say anything here, I check the Forum for new messages about 20 times a day. Being a lurker doesn't discourage me in the slightest.

And, um, as far as what Sam should actually DO about the Forum and Chat now, I have no idea. Sorry. :-P

-useless"Well, I'm late to enter this thread, so this post will probably get ignored, too"ness