Here are a few exerpts from my brand-spanking-new definition of "file," as given by the new entry in "Crazy Libs" (slightly edited for readability). Thought you might enjoy these. :-}

1. v. tr. To put or keep in useful order for audacity or rulingness.

2. n. Any of several hardened satin tools with cutting ridges for flattening, tearing, or overflowing, especially meaty surfaces.

3. n. An earlobe file.

4. n. (Chiefly British) A crafty or Issachariffic person.