Well, I hope my own stupid job anecdote makes you feel better.

When I lived in Memphis, one of my many jobs for the Colonel (the man who owned the hostel and the B&B) was bartending at wedding receptions. We hosted wedding receptions every week during the summer, since the main building was a huge Victorian mansion.

When I bartended, I mostly just poured champagne and fixed simple drinks such as mimosas and screwdrivers. The main part of the job was to "be friendly and look pretty," as the bosses put it. :)

Anyway, a reception was winding down, and I shut down the bar. My next job was to fetch coats, chat with the guests (part of the friendly image), and then clean up. However, there was a freshly opened champagne bottle which no one wanted.

The Colonel remarked, "There's a group of hostelers out back talking... why don't you offer it to them?"

So I went out the back door, where there was a group of about ten people. I called out to them, and them slipped on the steps.

I crashed to the ground, but not before wobbling around with the bottle held high. As I went down, the bottle spilled champagne all over me. I think it's funny when I fall down, so I started giggling hysterically as I struggled to my feet.

No one said anything, other than ask if I was ok, but I'm sure they thought I was drunk as a skunk. I was so embarrassed. I rushed back into the building, and I was covered in dirt and reeked of alcohol. I cleaned up what I could, and began to get the coats, but I got a lot of weird looks. The Colonel finally told me to go wash up because I looked and smelled like a drunken bum. Gah.

--Jez"at least it wasn't a bottle of Everclear... that would have stung pretty bad on my cuts and scrapes"zika