> > Hurrah for Rinkworks!!
> >
> > What a truly great Poll;
>
> Every time I see the poll sitting quietly over there on the right, I wonder.
> I wonder what Sam is going to do with all those stats that he has compiled with those polls. I don't think he has ever said. I think he once said that he wasn't going to say until all has been said. There are a number of possibilities.
> He could write a book.
> He could publish them on this site.
> He could start a newspaper column.
> He could testify before Congress.
> People are going to be interested is how people respond to questions like, "How many cavities do you have?" Or "How many times a week do you eat sushi?" Or "What's the first thought that passes through your mind when you wake up in the morning?"
> Yes, I'm sure he will do something with all that information. Otherwise, we have all been wasting a lot of time.
> Howard

Don't you get it by now? Rinkworks is just a site fronting for the top-secret Division 19 of the CIA; these stats will be used as part of the government's program to further control the minds of the nation's population.

The rest of the site is meant to dissemble subliminal messages (haven't you noticed those weird patterns in the Really Bad Jokes?) and generally keep the population distracted by humorous anecdotes, Web-based games and random thoughts from "Sam" (really a secret government project, known as "Cyc" to the gullible media) so they won't notice the coming of the New World Order.

The RinkChat and RinkForum are just a system to both recruit the future ruling class of the New World Order and ferret out possible threats to their plans. (Pun intended; I believe Kiki is an Illuminati Enforcer trying to test my loyalty. Well, I'm not giving you anything, you hear me? I won't talk, not even under torture! I won't betray Julia! If Number One wants the reasons for my resignation, let him meet me face to face! Fear the future! Trust no one! The truth is out there! Live long and prosper! Forty-two! We apologize for the inconvenience! You'll love the way you look, I guarantee it! Vons is Value! AARRGGH!)

*pop* *hiss*

SAM (Sentient Automatic Machine): Error. Artificial Intelligence Subunit 4033 "Arthur" has malfunctioned. Please replace head-unit on neck-interface and reboot.

Mysterious Cigarette-Smoking Man Named "Dave": Great, first he spews out classified information, then he overloads. I hate these new AIs; why can't we ever get normal human beings to populate the RinkForum and attract unsuspecting bystanders?

Arthur: Bzztmurglefurgle. *hiss*

Dave: Can someone come in here and clean this up, please?

SAM: No one is available to take your request right now. Please come back and try again later.

Dave: I don't know why I do this job... It's not like they even promised me my own continent, just my own country... My luck I'll probably get France, or worse, the United States...

Ar"Don't worry, I'm fine. *bzzt* I know nothing. What conspiracy?"thur