> Theory number one: Old people are funny*. One of our first stops was at a grocery store to get food for the car ride. After trying to decipher the names of the foreign stores of the region, we found a cryptically titled, "Shop and Save." After gathering up most of what we needed, Shannon and I rendevoused in the milk section where she was quickly accosted by an elderly shopper. She wanted to know where the nonfat milk was. Shannon was about to help her when the lady turned to another person and asked the same thing. As people scrambled to find not only the right type of milk but also the right brand, another shopper commented that this lady was a regular shopper and that this was her normal routine. Finally, the nonfat milk in the size and brand that she wanted was found. Unfortunately, the milk was labeled as "Skim Milk" and another exchange ensued about skim milk being the same as nonfat. As we walked away from the milk section, we heard the lady exclaim, "Wait, this is nonfat, I need the one and a half or two percent!" We ran. Last we saw, she was making her way to the checkout counter for more hilarity.
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> *I have bias towards old people. All ages can be funny. Back off.

My wife's Grammy (her New-Englanderish word for Grandmother), who is actually not her Grammy at all but her great aunt (pronounced "arnt" for all you non-New-Englanders), lives in New Hampshire. I almost think she could be the lady in your story, except that she lives out in the boondocks and probably doesn't have a Shop and Save anywhere near her.

I've only been to her home twice, and she also came to our wedding. But I always get the same impression. She is a feisty old woman, in her late eighties, maybe early nineties. She always talks about her various ills and the weather. She always offers us something to eat and a "tonic." (Again, for all you non-New-Englanders, "tonic" is the word for "pop" or "soda" in one of the vague, backwoods New-Hampshirese dialects.) She lost her driver's license a while back, but recently got it back again. She drives (of course!) a large, white BOAT of a car.

Old people ARE funny.

Gri"I want to live to be funny-three"shny