> Qua "needs to go to a shrink" rtz

I don't think so. Almost everything you've said, including your in-name quote, sounds like something I was thinking at 15 years old. I know at least two fellow RinkyDinks about your age who have echoed your sentiment, and I know more twentysomethings here that would say they've been where you are.

Which is not to say you're not a unique individual. You are. But you're a unique individual going through a confusion of emotions that untold numbers have journeyed through before.

Maybe people shouldn't take you so seriously? Sometimes they shouldn't. Sometimes they should. It depends on whether you're being serious or not. And of course you hunger for friendship. I believe very few of the people that claim not to.

Are you a pathetic loser because your friends are internet friends? No. 15ish is about the hardest time to make friends that you'll ever encounter in life, all other things being equal. It'll get easier. If you're a shy sort of person, you'll grow out of that, although it will take time. One of the better ways to make friends is to get involved in extra-curricular activities -- then you wind up in a small group of people with interests in common.

Hang in there. The feelings you describe are not pleasant, but it's also not abnormal. Two things: there is great cause for optimism, and you are not alone.