> > My greatest "things going wrong" trip was when I went to Samoa a few years ago. I thought I was being sent there to write an article about the country's first-ever Dive Tourism Festival. When I got there, it turned out that the Tourist Office You will be making your speech and presentation tomorrow morning at the festival opening." What? A speech? Huh?
> > It wasn't until a couple of weeks later, when I was back home, that I found out what had happened. The CEO of a New Zealand company which makes dive gear had also planned on attending, but had cancelled at the last minute. Apparently the news hadn't reached Samoa, and when this New Zealander turned up at the Tourist Office they assumed I must be the person who was there to make a speech and presentation in front of the Minister of Tourism and assembled representatives of the dive industry.
> > They had my name and the topic printed on the programme and everything. So what else could I do? I stayed up until 3 or 4 a.m. desperately writing a presentation about a topic I knew nothing whatsoever about, and I gave what has to be the least coherent speech in world history, and everyone was very polite and pretended they understood what I was talking about.
> > Apart from that, it was a great trip, but that's sort of like saying that apart from the location the North Pole is a great tropical resort.
> >
> > Brunnen-"and I still had to write the article, too"G
>
>
> That is worse then a real nightmare. Maybe going to New Zealand would be fun though, even if I had to write a speech I knew nothing about. Honestly, I don't think I could have done it.
>
> Sheddie"gladtohaveneverdonethat"Boo

Oh good Lord yes! That would have to be *my* absolute worst nightmare ever, bar none. B-G, would you have happened to save a copy of this particular speech scribble? I'd like to see what's your idea of a "least coherent speech in history". Heh heh. I recently came across a speech I wrote under duress when I was 14, I think, for a combined English/History class. I obviously had no idea what I was talking about. It was truly awful. The clearest theme I could follow in these scribblings was "Society doesn't have a clue; so History is made by the winners". Never mind that the first point really has nothing to do with that stated conclusion. Oh boy.

I just gotta enjoy these episodes of reliving very painful memories in every exquisite detail.

Wolf "brain takes a short trip and falls into bucket seat" spirit