> > I'm trying to start a collection of stupid warnings I see in commercials. One of the ones used often is "Professional driver on closed road." Some favorites of mine:
> > Do not drive on the ocean (for a car commercial where the car comes up on the ocean and makes a big splash leaving the others, presumably, drowned)
> > Do not use housepaint on face (enough said)
> > Don't drive like this or you'll end up like Uncle Carl (the dead-and-cremated guy in an urn in the back seat of an SUV driving maniacally up a mountain)
> >
> > -Dr. Morris Cecil "Not intended for human consumption" Glalet, Th.D.
> > Mon 13 Dec A.D. 1999
>
> Recently, on all types of Lottery commercials they've included the fine print: "to be used for entertainment purposes only, not meant for investment."
> Hmmmph... there goes my retirement.
>
> The same disclaimer about 'entertainment only' is also at the bottom of the screen for all psychic help lines. In fact there's one that gives you some free 30 minutes, or whatever, of psychic readings, but that's only if you sign up for their long distance company, and it's *one* free minute for your first 30 calls. The whole ad is for the LD company, yet that's only mentioned in the fine print!
>
> Tra "(gazing in crystal ball)...I see you getting ripped off..." nio

The way I feel, is if they were really al that psychic, they'ed know to call *ME*

Spider-"Isenseyouhaveaproblem""Wow,howdidyouknow?""Youcalled"-Boy