Many of you might be scatching your skull and thinking, "I've never heard of this movie." Well, neither had I until I attended a convention a few years back in search of the worst movies I could find (this has turned into an obession, along with finding the worst music of all time, but that is another story). I saw the box and immediately needed to know more. The box boasted that the guy that played a cop in "Plan 9 From Outer Space" was in this movie. I asked the merchant what this was, he looked at me and simply said, "I didn't have the guts to watch it. It's the only copy I have." After further discussion, the merchant simply gave me the movie, and, believe me, he got the better end of the deal.

The story -- well, to presume that there is one -- takes place in the desert. And that's it! No other locations are shown. The story -- oh, yeah -- basically, it is a mesh of amazons, a couple of space cowboys (Ed Wood's famous cop in tow), an Aztec Robot (?), and the Saturn Avenger. Basically it is one big fight. Oh, and there is this overlord (?) guy that smacks of Raul Julia in "Street Fighter" (ugh, I struggle to go on). This mushterpiece is only 20 minutes long (plus the 20 minutes thereafter of smelling salts and difibulation).

Anyway, the best way to describe this is a student attempt at paying homage to the likes of Santo, Ed Wood, Amazon Women on the Moon, and Far-Out Space Nuts." This is not for the inexperenced bad movie-goer.

Further research has revealed nothing. I cannot find it listed anywhere from the IMDb to the lowest corners of basement video stores. I have tried to contact the production company (I am wondering if it ever existed). Suffice it to say, this is, by far, the worst short film of all time. I, in my amateur filming mind, could not plan or execute (appropriate term) a movie this bad. And I could not retain the services of such a vast star as "Plan 9"'s cop.

Mass release of this movie would spark the opening of the seventh seal and the end of mankind. My friends have determined that I am the lone guardian of the one piece that could end all time.

And it's funny! I laughed myself into coma at one point. You have to CPR-certified to view this.

I'm interested to hear if anyone as had the displeasure of seeing this thing.

Response From RinkWorks:

Whoa. Just the title alone grabs me.