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It's a Bad, Bad, Bad, Bad Movie

Reader Review


The Black Hole

Posted by: Paul
Date Submitted: Tuesday, July 20, 1999 at 16:35:32
Date Posted: Monday, July 26, 1999 at 05:19:07

The crew of a ship, including an English butler "Anti-Gravity To The End" (AGTTE) robot, goes to investigate the deaths of the crew of another ship, which is manned by the disturbingly reassuring captain, a slicer-happy robot (Maximilian, I think), and a bunch of Trigger-Happy-But-None-Too-Accurate (THBNTA) robots. Oh yeah, and one of the dead crew was the father of the sole female character. Upon further investigation, the English AGTTE finds an AGTTE that seems to have had its voice programmed by a cowboy. Somewhere along the way, the AGTTEs engage in a sort of outer-space target practice game with the THBNTAs (they shoot at asteroids, not each other). The AGTTEs are superior, and this makes the THBNTAs mad. (?) In the meantime, the ship is drifting closer and closer to The Black Hole. This is what the captain wants; he's obsessed with it. The crew, however, want him to return with them. When they leave, neither side convinced of the accuracy of the other one, he orders the THBNTAs to attack. Of course the ship is geting closer...and closer...and closer. Soon, it becomes impossible to leave. The ship starts breaking apart, and they have to fight THBNTAs wherever they go. Somehow, they SURVIVE all this except for Cowboy AGTTE, who leaves to be crushed by The Black Hole after a CPU-warming goodbye scene. And, after coming through the black hole, we learn...that Heaven and Hell are two sides of the same planet! Oh, and the captain dies, too. Maximilian carries him to the "Hell" side of the planet. Credits.

Rating: 1 turkey; 2 if you like sci-fi. The Arcade-ish scene was slightly amusing. I mean, the AGTTEs are deadly accurate, and they're afraid of the THBNTAs? I guess, since they're protecting the ship from all those crazy enough to come near.


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