After reading Susan's review of "The Time Machine," I thought I'd go ahead and do up one for "Time After Time" (which was played right after "The Time Machine" on last Saturday's MonsterVision). The premise for THAT is simple: H. G. Wells must track Jack the Ripper in 1979 San Francisco after Jack takes Wells' time machine. Yeah, a bit kooky. Actually it plays out kind of interestingly, and I wouldn't include it on this page were it not for the incredibly horrible last half hour and a few other oddities.

The movie is a unique mix of time travel goofiness and suspense thriller. Once H. G. gets to 1979, we are treated to Malcolm McDowell doing a good job of being both confused at the future as well as trying to hunt down a dangerous killer. I would have been very happy if the movie would have followed this formula all the way through. Instead it decides to throw in a romantic angle by pairing Mary Steenburgen with Wells. I never once understood exactly what she saw in him, and much of her purpose seems to be to give the badguy something to hold over Wells' head. She is the stereotypical female victim with the exception that she spouts off women's lib non-sequiturs every now and then.

Anyway, Jack goes on a killing spree and does figure out that Wells is shacked up with Mary, and he threatens to kill her unless H. G. will turn over the key to the time machine which will let him send H. G. back to the past AND go hopping through time. Why Jack doesn't just kill Wells and take the stupid key, I don't know. I guess it's because although she's a liberated woman, Mary is still just a helpless female and is therefore easier to take hostage. Meanwhile Wells takes Mary two days into the future to prove that he really is a time traveller. There they pick up a paper that lets us know that Jack will kill Mary the previous day.

This is where the movie falls completely apart. They have a working time machine. Wells realizes this. Instead of doing something intelligent like heading back in time to catch the Ripper when he first gets to 1979 or going forward to put Mary somewhere safe, they RETURN TO THE TIME THEY JUST LEFT. Even worse, they go back to Mary's apartment, which is where the paper clearly says she'll be killed. Huh? She demonstrates some intelligence by thinking they shouldn't do this; however, Wells rationalizes this by saying that they'll just be gone before the Ripper gets there. Through the dumbest set of circumstances I could imagine, Mary is left alone when the Ripper is supposed to show up.

But these circumstances are the best "bad" part of the film. H. G. leaves the house to buy a gun. (Previously he had been against weapons or violence of any sort.) He tells Mary to "get some rest" and that they'll leave when he gets back. In all her wisdom, she decides to take some Valium, along with brandy, which completely knocks her out for hours. On his way back, Wells gets busted by the cops who thinks he's responsible for the Ripper's murders. In the stupidest scene in the movie, H. G. begs the cop that's interrogating him to send a car to Mary's apartment to check it out. This cop is perhaps the world's worst. He decides not to. Despite the fact that they busted Wells rushing into Mary's apartment, they WILL NOT even go inside. Hours pass and eventually Wells agrees to confess so long as they send a car to check out the apartment. But it's too late, and Mary has been horribly slaughtered. Wells is released, grief-stricken.

Aha! It turns out that Mary wasn't dead -- it was just her unfortunate co-worker that was brutally killed. No one shows any remorse for the rest of the movie over this. But Jack has Mary hostage and gets the key off Wells, and there is a chase scene as they both go to the time machine (Mary is still Jack's hostage). They get to the time machine, and Jack lets Mary go to take off to infinity and beyond. At the last second Wells pulls out some rod from the side which causes Jack to be warped into nothingness. (I knew this would happen because H. G. mentioned the rod at the beginning of the movie for no apparent reason, which by movie logic means it will come in handy later.) H. G. and Mary go back to H. G.'s time, despite Mary's earlier statement that she wouldn't go back because she didn't want to give up her career. The end.

Bah. Like I said, it was decent up until the end. I can't really give it too high a turkey rating, maybe around two or so. (I'd probably give it 2 1/2 stars on a 5 star scale for good movies.) Worth watching if you're a time travel fan (as I am) or if you're a fan of bad movies (as I am) just so you can enjoy the otherwise horrible ending.

Scene to watch for: The interrogation scene.

Best line: "I've sent him where he belongs...to infinity."

Things that make you go "Huh?": The fact that with the exception of Bill and Ted, nobody in time travel movies ever seem to realize that they have a time machine.