Bingo is a variation of the Faithful Dog Finds And Returns To Sad Depressed And Slightly Suicidal Prepubescent Former Owner genre. The major variation is the fact that it sucked.

The dog was treated like a human, and not in the usual kid-movie way either. It wore a Hawaiian shirt and ugly sunglasses, communicated that its favorite food was cold cream sandwiches without speaking a word, and was arrested for robbing an armored car. In fact, Bingo was foiling the robbery of that car when the evil lawyer pinned the blame on him.

Any movie can have a lame plot, bad dialogue, a main character that never speaks an intelligent word, terrible acting, and a totally predictable ending. Hey, any Keanu Reeves movie has most of those things. The problem lies in the fact that Bingo has *all* of these flaws, in abundance, and the directors seem to be absolutely oblivious to the pathetic final product.

I split the cost of renting the movie with a friend; it was a complete waste of my fifty cents and two hours. I am dumber for having seen this movie. I only laughed during "Bingo" as some sort of steam valve -- if I hadn't vented my general pity and disgust somehow, I would have dissolved into a pool of apathy.

It is appalling that a movie so completely lacking entertainment, comic, AND dramatic value could be endorsed by any sane person. It is a worthless movie. I submit this review as a public service: DON'T WATCH BINGO!!

Scene to watch for: The knife fight in the prison laundry room.

Things that make you go "Huh?": Cold cream sandwiches?