Archives: Self-Chat
12/22/99
Sometimes Dave talks to himself. It's just one of those things.
Dave has entered.
Dave: Talking to myself RULES!
Dave: I enjoy talking to myself, really. I mean, nobody but me has anything interesting to say, anyway, right?
Dave: Yeah, right. I'm the only person in the chatroom who ever says anything worth listening too. I'm pretty cool like that.
Dave: All those other people, they come on, and they're all like "blah blah blah, blah blah me, blah me blah."
Dave: And I'm all "Go away, only I am cool enough to be speaking right now."
Dave: But they never go away. I even try to kick them out, but they keep coming back.
Dave: It's enough to make a guy go crazy, it is. Absolutely crackers.
Dave: I was just telling myself the other day, "You know, you should really watch out for yourself, because if you keep hanging out in that chatroom, those other people are going to drive you crazy."
Dave: But then I said to myself "Nah, I'm so much cooler than all of them that I can't be bothered by their silliness."
Dave: So I like these times when I'm by myself. I can really do some good chatting, then.
Dave: So, where's everybody from?
Dave: New Hampshire? That's interesting, so am I!
Dave: Just the other day I was walking down the street, and I saw this homeless guy begging for change. I said "Get a job, you lazy bum."
ladybluebird has entered.
Dave: But then he comes up to me and shows me the fat wad of cash he has in his pocket, and says "I make two-three hundred smackers a day, how much do you make?"
Dave: And I'm thinking "Whoa, this bum is loaded!" So I mugged him. I figured he could just get more anyway.
Dave: But now I'm considering a career change. I think I'll become a hobo and ride the rails. It seems like a logical thing to do, afterall.
Dave: Hello ladyblubird.
Dave: You can join in anytime you want, ladybluebird. I was just talking to myself, but I'm better now.
ladybluebird has left.
Dave: Oh well, I guess she didn't want to chat.
Dave: She must have saw that she couldn't measure up to my abilities, and buggered off.
Dave: Speaking of which, I think "bugger off" is a great expression, and that we Americans should use it more often.
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Grace has entered.
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minamoon has entered.
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Dave: I think there should be heated tunnels that connect all buildings.
Dave: I hate having to spend two or three minutes getting all bundled up just to walk fifty feet next door.
Dave: Even worse, I hate having to walk out to my car in the morning in the freezing cold, and wait for it to warm up.
Dave: All cars should be stored in heated underground garages, which would be build pretty much everywhere.
Dave: Then I'd just have to go start it up, and I could sit in comfort until the heater was hot enough to go to work.
Dave: Then when it was time to go to lunch, I could just walk through the heated tunnel to the restaurant down the street.
Dave: But maybe this isn't the best way to go about solving this problem.
Dave: I think what we should really do is heat the outdoors year round.
Dave: Then there wouldn't be any problems. I could wear shorts in December.
Dave: But we should turn the heaters off for about a week before and after Christmas, so we can have a white Christmas. Because I get all depressed when it's all bare out on Christmas morning.
Dave: But after New Years day or so, crank them babies up and lets get back to swimming!
Dave: What does everyone else think about my scheme?
Dave: Anybody? Anybody?
Dave: Come on you two, are you talking girl talk behind my back?
Grace: a/msg minamoon grrl talk grrl talk grrl talk teeheeheee
Grace: oops :)
Grace: I'm gonna go.
Dave: Ok. So long, Grace. Take care.
Grace: good night.
Grace has left.
Dave: Well. It is down to you, and it is down to me.
Dave: You still there, minamoon?
Dave: I got up one morning and found out I had turned into Wonder Woman sometime during the night.
Dave: It was weird. I had that silly suit on, and I had the lasso, and the invisible jet was parked in my yard.
Dave: I ran right into the dang thing twice before I figured out how to get in and turn on that 'dashed line' indicator thing so I could see where it was.
Dave: So then I had my friends shoot at me with bullets so I could deflect them with my wristbands. It was pretty cool.
Dave: But then the next day, I woke up and I was back to normal. So whatever, I guess.
Stratomagi has entered.
Dave: One time I thought I had turned into The Swamp Thing, but it turns out I'd just forgotten to take a shower for about three months.
Dave: Has that ever happened to you, Stratomagi?
Dave: Probably not. Most people remember to take showers.
Dave: I usually remember, but sometimes I just forget. And then sometimes I just forget a lot.
Dave: Until I wake up one morning thinking I'm The Swamp Thing.
Stratomagi has left.
* Dave sighs
Dave: Scared away another one.
Dave: Well, it's just you and me again, minamoon. So now I will sing you a song.
Dave: min-a-moon,
Dave: you're not made of tin-a-moon
Dave: I like to pinch my skin-a-moon
Dave: min-a-moon
Dave: That was a pretty cool song.
Dave: If I do say so myself. And I believe I just did.
Dave: "A peanut sat on the railroad tracks, it's heart was all a-flutter! A train came rumbling down the bend, toot! toot! peanut butter!"
Dave: That's an even better song, but unfortunately I can't take credit for it.
Dave: Round the bend, silly, not down the bend.
Dave: Sometimes I'm dumb like that. Sometimes I'll try to write "all" and instead it'll come out "antidisestablishmentarianism."
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